For the better part of 2016, I have been in a reflective state, and since I have spent most of the year “in my feelings” (as my students would say), my blog while i was busy thinking suffered and so did I. Why? Because I didn’t get the chance to do what I love which is blog about the things I love to do and share them with you.
So what happened in my life in 2016 that has kept me away from you? Well, to be quite frank, about 8 months ago my husband and I found out that we, at the tender age of 42 (me) and 44 now 45 (him), are going to be parents again, and to be brutally honest neither of us were happy. We felt betrayed by one another, my OB (who told me that I had “very few viable eggs remaining,” Mother Nature, and unfortunately, because of our bleak vision, we kept the news of our baby to ourselves. Not sharing our news with others, including our families and closest friends, it pretty much made it hard for me to share anything about anything here with you on the blog. So I didn’t. I kept it all in, and did what I tend to do best, I thought about it.
For the most part, it was easy not blog. First of all, I wasn’t slow cooking at all. Why? Because I wasn’t eating, and I really didn’t care to smell anything in my house.
I also didn’t shop or care to put together any stylish outfits to share. I could care less what I looked like. To say the least, I was unmotivated, and I didn’t care.
It wasn’t until I talked to my mama about my situation and my feelings that I realized I had no reason whatsoever to be depressed about the life, the blessing growing inside me. She was so raw and honest with me. She told me that I had nothing to be ashamed of. She told me that God was blessing me with what I had been asking Him for, and to not let the spirit of fear keep me from my blessings. Her words were the turning point in my pregnancy. On that day, I fully accepted my blessing, and once my attitude changed, so did my husband’s. At that time, I was nearly 12 weeks pregnant. I cannot express to you just how much my acceptance, our acceptance, made a difference in our lives. We had been angry with ourselves and each other for so long that loving one another had become an option.
Today, we could not be happier about our new addition coming soon. Our baby boy, the missing piece to our puzzle.